“No Strings Attached”: Ashton and Natalie do the “hookup generation”
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So in “No Strings Attached” we’ve got a former TV goofball and a former “Star Wars” decoration pretending to get it on like crazy, under the guidance of quasi-legendary comedy veteran Ivan Reitman. And “pretending” is definitely the right word. There’s an easygoing, lounging-around-in-sweat pants quality about “No Strings Attached” that makes me not hate it, and future Oscar nominee Natalie Portman and never-in-a-million-years Oscar nominee Ashton Kutcher are good sports about trying to deliver a contempo twist to the tired rom-com formula. We get to hear Portman shouting “Hey! Look at my dick!” and “This hole is my bitch!” (I’m not explaining why) and watch Kutcher stare mournfully into the middle distance, in total wounded-girl mode, while bad emo pop plays on the soundtrack.
But when people have sex in a movie — that wasn’t, you know, made in Hungary and meant to convince you that life is meaningless — isn’t it a good idea to make it seem kind of hot? Because on that score, “No Strings Attached” is a near-total failure. Sure, the premise is supposed to be that Emma (Portman) and Adam (Kutcher) are longtime acquaintances who embark on a “sex friend” relationship that will be devoid of pet names, snuggling, emergency contact info or even breakfast. But their coupling lacks any physical or emotional spark — it’s Emma who tells a fellow resident at her L.A. hospital, “Look at the height difference! When I stand next to him it looks like he’s kidnapping me!” — and they come off more like cheerful workout partners or calculus-homework buds than like Mr. and Ms. Drop Your Panties Right Now.
By Andrew O’Hehir
In fact, despite the good-looking stars, the R rating and the so-called high concept, “No Strings Attached” has a lot more old-fashioned shtick than steam or sizzle. That shouldn’t be surprising from Reitman, who will one day find an honored place in movie-geek heaven as the director of “Ghostbusters” but has also produced or directed any number of mediocre airline-grade comedies, from “Legal Eagles” to “Dave” to “My Super Ex-Girlfriend.” He’s never demonstrated any gift for romance or sexiness, and simply isn’t the guy to get something out of stars like Kutcher and Portman if it doesn’t come naturally. (más…)
